Willpower

Nothing exposes my lack of willpower like going for a run. Within the first few steps, my body begins to tingle, boobs begin to dance, and my breathing gets labored. Soon after, the combination of tedium, fatigue, and pain sets in, often before I’ve hit start on my curated motivational playlist. From that point on, it’s a battle against willpower. I have a losing record against willpower.

Running exposes the frailty of my fortitude. On the scale of complexity factors, it does not get much simpler. Step 1: run. Step 2: don’t stop running. Very simple.

I know this about myself. This is why I try mind games: run for five straight songs, make it to the next stoplight and you will get a breather, listen to an Audible. Inevitably, I stop running before then, place a hand over my lower abdomen so all the cars driving by think I just got a cramp in my side, and don’t see me for the quitter that I am. It’s very demoralizing to quit a goal with no one to take the blame but myself. Just broken willpower.

I can’t blame the interruption on a busy schedule, impromptu client meeting, work deadline, or a busy day full of distractions.

Maybe this is why business owners languish for so long. We hide our dysfunction behind the complexity of our grind. With so many moving parts, the lack of discipline and misplaced priorities gets hidden in the hustle.

Triaging problem after problem, letting urgency override priority. It is entirely possible to fill the day with the wrong productive behaviors and feel purposeful about it.

Until bedtime. From birth, we’ve been scared of the dark. Now it is the intrusive thoughts that hide under the bed. Without a systematic plan for my business, when I close my eyes, there is nothing to divert my attention. The actual priorities that I ignored all day begin to creep in. This is probably why most people scroll themselves to sleep. It’s easier than accepting that your day got derailed from a lack of willpower.

The only thing that would quiet my soul enough to fall asleep was an earnest promise to get it right the next day. Like a deadbeat boyfriend promising to do better but never changing. A twisted one act play unfolds in my mind, having late night internal dialogues with myself. Because I know me so well, it takes a heck of a lot more than a sincere “Baby, I’m sorry, please forgive me” for me to let myself off the hook. But as I said before, I frequently lose the battle with willpower. So I always take myself back after enough browbeating and sincere promises to change. I’m a sucker that way.

Late in the night, when the contract between my mind and my soul is complete that tomorrow I would do better and follow through, I allow myself to drift asleep.

Maybe I would stay on track for a couple of days, even up to a week. But inevitably, I would delude myself one day as to why today’s urgency demanded more attention than the actual priority, and so the cycle goes.

Or maybe this is just me.

We are all familiar with the definition of insanity, right? Doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result. But knowledge is not wisdom. Just because we know the definition does not mean we stop believing the lies that keep us prisoners in our own minds. That’s what makes someone insane, right? Believing something that isn’t true.

Insane people don’t lack knowledge; they lack wisdom to unwind themselves from their own insanity, stuck in a loop, living out their own Groundhog Day. A refusal to see their blind spots and endure the tedium, fatigue, and pain long enough to experience breakthrough.

Clinically, I have no business diagnosing the truly insane. But as a business coach with a decade of experience, I can tell you the number one thief of God given talent and ambition is insanity. Individuals with delusional thinking recognize they have the talent, know they aren’t living up to their full potential, yet still refuse to acknowledge their blind spots.

There was a study commissioned by John Acuff. Over 3,000 people were surveyed. Only 4 percent believed they were living up to their full potential. Four percent? The other ninety six percent were not.

That’s insane. We have one life. Living it to the fullest should be our only pursuit.

Ninety six percent of the population were either:
Not willing to do what it takes.
Did not know what to do.
Or did not know who to ask for help.

There is no plausible reason why any of us would trade in our own unique version of our full potential for a knockoff, counterfeit version. That is what settling for less than our full potential really is.

Like dating the deadbeat you know you are better off ditching because it’s comfortable, predictable, and keeps you safe. Not safe from them–they harm you constantly. Safe from yourself, for if you never stretch to reach full potential then you can’t be hurt when you fall short.

The only reason I can think of why someone stays in a toxic relationship with others or with themselves is insanity. With only one life to live, our full effort should be to maximize it.

So, two questions to journal about today:

Are you living up to your full potential? How do you know? Are you working off a clearly defined and strategic plan? Not just for business but for your own full potential.

Secondly, if not, what’s holding you back?
A. Not willing to do what it takes.
B. Don’t know what to do.
C. Don’t know who to ask for help.

Breakthrough is not hiding in complexity. It is hiding in simplicity.

The work required for the small business owner to break through into greatness is rarely complicated. It is repetitive. It is tedious. It exposes your willpower. That is why most people never do it long enough to see who they could become.

You do not need a new goal. You need the wisdom to break up with your own insanity. Break the loop. Refuse your own excuses. End your personal Groundhog Day.

The preceding is an excerpt from ‘Breakthrough’ a 10 week course designed to help business owners thrive. Cohorts start quarterly. Click on the link to find out when the next cohort begins.